Archive for June, 2005

Aaaaa-hahahahaha!

Wednesday, June 29th, 2005

I just discovered that someone found me when they googled “Orlando Bloom is tasty”.

That trumps Nude Canadians *any* day.

(I am going to bed. Seriously. I am!)

Detoxification 101

Wednesday, June 29th, 2005

Should one’s pores still be emanating booze two days later? We pickled our livers two days ago, and yet… I still feel just slightly like I’ve been run over by a Mack Truck.

Mind you, I don’t do this sort of thing often (shush, Feckless!), and my poor old body handles it differently now than it did mumble years ago in University.

Though sweltering hot outside, it was a most lovely wedding. You can count on my friend Laura to throw quite the nuptial bash.

With Ari Hart’s help, I was able to find some most excellent ‘do me’ shoes (I wish I had a photo of them to post… alas) that went perfectly with my sexy little dress, but unfortunately it was all for naught. There weren’t any single guys at the wedding. Oh, well. I will bring the shoes to Reno next month, ’cause hey, I still looked damned good in them.*

What else do you people need to know? Otherwise, the weekend was great. It was beyond hot outside, so we spent an inordinate amount of time in and around the pool. I am also sunburned in some interesting patterns.**

My flights were good, but I’m not a great flier. The whole experience could be letter-perfect from start to finish, but I’d still be nervous. One of the criteria for the Great Sugar Daddy Hunt is that he should travel first class at all times or have his own private Jet.

Okay. Since it’s coming up 11PM, local time, and I need to be awake at o’dark-thirty, I’m going to toss my worn-out self into bed.

May your livers be safe and protected.

—–

*The shoes hurt after a short while, though. Why is it that women must suffer to look cute? It’s a damned good thing that I was able to change out of them as quickly as I did.

**Do not ask. Please. Don’t.

We Came, We Saw, We Drank Like Fish

Tuesday, June 28th, 2005

Weddings are a blast.

Scratch that. Let me say that being a guest at a wedding (and not one of the pair actually tying the knot) is a blast.

It’s late, and I’m hundreds of miles from home, so I won’t get into the details until I’m back in Canuckland, but suffice it to say there was much Rum and Vodka in the picture, and it boiled down to the Bronx versus the Canucks on the Irish turf also known as a pub. (A pretty awesome one, at that.)

I’m still not sure just how long it’ll take me to recover.

Kippis!

I-Am-Slowly-Going-Crazy-1-2-3-4-5-6-Switch!

Thursday, June 23rd, 2005

Crazy-going-slowly-am-I-6-5-4-3-2-1-Switch!

Yes, yes, apparently I am. It’s a very good thing that I’ve not had a drop of anything at the moment, because if I were to do so, I’d probably fall over in a fit of drunken exhaustion.

So…the alarm will be ringing at o’dark-thirty in order for me to get my rear end across the border and to the hairport on time. Oy. On the bright side, though, by this time tomorrow night, I will be elbow-deep in “fruity fuckers”. (Consider my curiosity piqued.) Heh.

And as I’m leaving out the door this morning, the Pater sez to me, “Don’t come home with a boyfriend,” sez he, “You know about single women and weddings.”

“Not to worry,” sez I, “that is not my intent.”

Oh, man. Just for saying that, I am completely scrod. I’ve tempted fate, and will now have to suffer the consequences. Hellfire and damnation.

Of course, if he’s hot and rich, I may have to make an exception.

In other news, I need some sort of electronic apparatus that I can strap to my head that will instantly transcribe all the witty bits that I come up with during the day into blog entries. ‘Cause I always come up with the good lines while in the shower or driving the car. Never whilst sitting at the computer.

Am most glad to see folks voting in the poll. I’m going to come up with some other fun ones in the future. (They *will* be fun. I guar-an-tee it.)

I’m going to stop this now, before I completely lose every last brain cell I have to a Blog entry. (Now wouldn’t *that* be embarrassing!)

Fare thee well, mein friends, and I shall see thee anon. Suitably hungover, of course.

I am *so* not a computer geek, so this is a test…

Tuesday, June 21st, 2005


Ack!

Tuesday, June 21st, 2005

Where has my time gone? I have to leave at the butt-crack of dawn on Thursday, in order to begin my weekend of mayhem and debauchery, and I’m not nearly ready to go yet!

I have to figure out what I’m wearing this weekend, find my extra shoes, buy a new pair of dress shoes to wear to the wedding, get my highlights done, get a pedicure, make sure my cell is charged, get my oil changed, purchase trip insurance (hey, you never know), locate my jewelry box (packed *somewhere* in the hell called the basement)… there’s more, but I won’t bore you with the details. Flock!

Not to mention I’m beyond tired. (But it was worth it. Boondock Saints ROCKED. What an amazing movie! And the spiced Rum was awesome, too. Thanks, Deet!)

Okay. It’s T-minus three days (give or take) and counting. Wish me luck, ’cause I think I’m gonna need it…

Didja Ever Have One of Those Days…?

Saturday, June 18th, 2005

Let me start by saying Orlando Bloom is tasty. Finger-lickin’ good, even. Going to see Kingdom of Heaven last night actually made up for the rest of the day. I was anxious about seeing the movie, because even though I liked him in Pirates of the Caribbean (go Johnny!) and Troy, he was still such a skinny, wooden Milquetoast. The posters for KoH were promising, but the proof was going to be in the pudding, my friends.

And I’m pleased to report that the movie didn’t disappoint. Especially the one lonely, solitary, underplayed shirtless scene.

Hamina, hamina. *drool*

Orli’s been goin’ to the gym, it appears. He doesn’t look 18 anymore. He also came across as being more natural on screen. Almost as if he’s settling into his skin and feeling comfortable with who he is now. Our young’un is maturing, it seems. And that’s just ALL good.

I have to admit, I love him in period pieces. There’s something about an artfully-scruffy Orli, a horse and a sword that’s just hot. Heh.

I was actually inspired with a story idea by a specific picture of him that I found on the Internet. I will post it in my blog once I find the damned thing. (It’s actually a contemporary picture, and he’s still really young looking in it, but hey. I’m not choosy. Is that obvious, or what?)

On the sexy guy front, too, Liam Neeson has a brief role in the movie. Yum.

Hey, I’m not into ageism. Equal opportunity for all, I say.

Now that I’ve done my lusting after The Big O (ah, so fitting…) I’ve gotta dash. I shall return to talk about just how wacky the day itself was. And the funny thing is? This kind of shit never happens to me. I hear other people’s wild stories of their day-to-day adventures and think, “Wow. How come I’ve never got stories like that to tell?” But then I’m reminded of that ancient blessing/curse (and for the life of me I don’t recall which ethnicity it comes from) – “May you live in interesting times.”

And I think that maybe a reasonably quiet life isn’t such a bad thing. Although some Orli excitement would be just fine, thanks.

Quiz post is gone

Wednesday, June 15th, 2005

I had to delete the post with the quiz result in it, because it did something to completely fuck up my Blog, and really, that offended my delicate sensibilities.

I’ve got nothing to say at the moment, so I shall return when I can be suitably entertaining.

ps. the Great Sugar Daddy Hunt is on. Details forthcoming.

Forty-nine!?!

Monday, June 13th, 2005

Woo-HOO! Forty-nine unique visitors to the Blog!

C’mon, everybody — gimme an Arsenio “whoop-whoop”!

Can we get FIFTY? Anybody want to give me fifty?

Feh.

I think I need chocolate. And I already finished my huge yummy bar of Finnish Fazer milk chocolate… (I’m not normally a milk-chocolate fan, but Fazer is so smooth and creamy… *sigh*)

Oh, and I can’t write tonight. I’ve got freelance work to do, and if I don’t get a move on, I won’t have it completed for the due date.

Double Feh.

Pardon Us While We Interrupt This Program…

Monday, June 13th, 2005

Good day. We here at the legal firm of Chiss, Mye, Buht felt we should intervene at this point in time in order to prevent the further soiling of Ms. Starr’s somewhat questionable reputation. Upon reading these messages, we, Ms. Starr’s harried legal counsel, wish to put to rest the unthinkable insinuation found here — that, indeed, Ms. Starr drinks like a fish.

Please note that Ms. Starr’s occasional indulgence in alcoholic beverages should not be construed as a tendency thereto. While there may be an evening or six in Ms. Starr’s varied and colorful past that remains a dark and private secret rife with Tequila, frat boys and the occasional mango, we are assured by our client that becoming tanko is no longer at the top of the priority list.

It’s number four.

We thank you for your kind attention, and return you to your pleasure reading.